Sunday, June 11, 2006

Moron

My period started with a vengeance this morning--5 days late. Enough time to make me wonder, get me excited and take a pregnancy test. And of course it was negative. Of course. We haven't been trying, in fact we've been super careful. But I thought, since I had my baby taken away from me, wouldn't it be great if I just turned up pregnant? No effort, no worry, just pregnant. Like I had some kind of cosmic coupon--sorry about that last one, Laura. This one is on us. Why can't I just behave normally anymore?

This whole thing is such a bitch. A big, heaving, snarling bitch, and I didn't sign up for this.

4 comments:

Emma's Mum said...

I know -- I feel the same way -- we did not sign up for this!!
I wish so much that everything would be easy after what we have been through. It really scares me for when we are allowed to start trying - which is still months away. I am thinking about you -- and send you strength and courage....

Sarah said...

I was told by two medical professionals who I mentioned my 12 day late period to... "Stress can really interfere with cycle regularity".

So... cut back on the stress.

But seriously... I wish you had had an "oops" we weren't trying yet baby! Sorry

Jill said...

You DO deserve a pass on this point, for sure. Seems everyone goes kinda crazy at the end of each month even when there is practically no chance. You aren't alone ((hugs))

lauralu said...

last spring, when it was too soon to safely get pregnant again, and we were doubling up (the pill and condoms), i still held my breath once a month. hope springs eternal.